Published at 23/09/2024 22:24
Created at 04/02/2024
472 words - 2.36 min of reading time
Once upon a time died a human being named Caesar.
He now found himself in a line heading towards paradise, with Saint Peter rigorously evaluating souls one by one, deciding if they could enter.
When it was his turn, Saint Peter looked at him sternly, from head to toe, and finally granted him passage and asked him to proceed to heaven.
Caesar didn't move.
"No, Saint Pete, I don't deserve to go in there. You can send me to the blazes," he said, with a trembling voice.
Saint Peter was curious.
"Why do you think you don't deserve it, child of God?"
"I was a dirty dog, I fooled around a lot, and went to red light places, you know what I mean, Pete? It's better if I go to Hell," confessed Caesar, hiding his face in his hands, ashamed.
Saint Peter evaluated his soul again and declared, kindly:
"I see that you've been with ladies of the night, but you often regretted it, and in some cases, you stayed for a long time because you had genuine affection and built relationships. In this way, God can forgive, for love is the greatest of all forces. I grant you passage."
"No, no, no, Saint Pete, you're not getting it. I was a boozer, spent my whole life in dive bars, messing around with others, blowing money on bets. I'm an animal. You can open the basement door."
Saint Peter was firm again.
"I see no cause for that. I looked into your soul and saw only that you sought fun with your friends, offered to drive them home when they were unwell, tried to get many off that path, and even spent money from your own pocket to pay others' debts. You are not an animal, and you are as deserving as others here."
"Saint Pete, you're putting me in a tough spot here. I was greedy, I screwed over a lot of people at work. My greed knew no bounds, how can you want to let a dog like me pass?"
"Ah, if those are your concerns, do not worry. I see here that your actions were only against people of ill repute, and moreover, you always valued supporting your family."
"Family, hah!"
Caesar stomped his foot on the ground, impatient, indignant.
"No, I fought a lot with my family, I was bossy, rude, stupid, a good-for-nothing. You can send me downstairs."
"Never! I see that your family was full of problematic figures and you did what you could, losing your temper at times, it's true, but nothing that condemns you," Saint Peter reassured him, patiently.
"You're making this complicated for me, aren't you?! Don't you understand that in heaven I won't find my lovers, nor my friends, nor colleagues, nor family? Why the hell would I want to go there?"
